It’s a sweet, indelible image: My dad, six-foot-two and lean as a green bean holding hands with my then two-year-old daughter, clad in a
puffy turquoise sunsuit. My dad’s long arm reaches down, my daughter’s tiny one reaches up, and they look into each other’s eyes as they
make their way, laughing, down the hill from our rented beach house to the ice cream store in town. That simple, joy-filled walk that
Dana took with her Pop-Pop was one of many special moments shared by three generations of our family during a week-long vacation
together.
Traveling with multiple generations of family can be rich and rewarding. It’s an opportunity to reunite, reminisce, discover, celebrate.
But friction can develop, too, as family members who don’t live together in the real world try to live together in the vacation world.
Whether you rent a ski chalet, cabin in the woods or motel rooms near Disney World, some honest pre-trip discussion and planning can
help ensure that everyone enjoys your multi-generational journey.
Before leaving home, discuss:
How close the quarters? Chris and Dave Blelloch, a Boston-area couple with three grade-schoolers, have taken several vacations with
extended family. Some have been less than perfect, others a joy. The difference? Space. For a reunion trip to North Carolina, the
clan, which included aunts, uncles, grandparents and a gaggle of cousins, rented one large house. “It didn’t work,” said Chris. “Too
close.”
For a more recent trip to Cape Cod, the group booked separate, side-by-side condos. Each family had its own living space, and the
resort’s beach and play area with barbecue pit served as common gathering ground. Harmony reigned.
What are the ground rules – and floor plan? It’s easier to set behavior and etiquette guidelines before a trip than to fret and feud
while on vacation because, for example, teenagers come in late, make noise in the kitchen and wake the family. Mom and dad may be used
to this at home, but grandma and grandpa aren’t. And mom and dad may need a break from it. It’s their vacation, too.
Set ground rules and devise plans that address issues like curfews; accommodation of early risers and night owls; babies’ naptimes;
uses of common space; control of amenities like TVs, computers, sound systems, sports equipment and rental cars. The payoff for your
negotiations will be a vacation haven that’s truly a peaceable kingdom.
If you’ll be staying in a vacation rental, knowing the property’s floor plan and layout can help you make advance decisions on
potentially thorny issues like bedroom assignments. Who gets the biggest or quietest room, the room nearest the bathroom, the ground
floor room, the room in the attic two flights up, the room that faces a busy street? Vacation rental sites like Interhome.com,
CyberRentals.com and vrbo.com
(Vacation Rentals by Owner) have photos and property descriptions and, with the latter two, you deal directly with the owners and can
email them with questions.
Whose turn to dry? You may not want to think about work while on vacation, but jobs will need doing, especially if you’re vacationing
in a rental property without restaurants or maid service. Who will shop, cook, clean, watch the kids? If the men golf in the morning,
should the women get a few kid-free hours at the pool or gym in the afternoon? Grandma may love hosting family holiday feasts, but she
may not want to spend her vacation cooking. Talking in advance about the division of leisure and labor will lighten everyone’s load.
How much togetherness? You’re traveling together, but you’re individuals and separate families, and it’s likely you’ll want and need
time apart. Interests, habits, age, finances and health will steer each person and family toward different pursuits. Will you eat in or
out? If out, how often? Or will each family do its own thing at mealtime? Should you have several vehicles available so people can go
different places? Some of you may want to take daily road trips or climb mountains while others want only to sit and read. Establishing
a different strokes for different folks policy gives everyone guilt-free freedom to partake in or pass on outings or activities.
On an intergenerational vacation, planning and communication help smooth the way for wonderful shared experiences.
Like holding hands and laughing all the way to the ice cream store.
About The Author:
Lori Hein is an author, a traveling mom and a freelancer specializing in travel writing. Her book,
Ribbons of Highway: A Mother-Child Journey Across America ,
takes you around the U.S., and her blog, Ribbons of Highway,
takes you around the world. Visit her professional site at at LoriHein.com.
* This article is available for your publication, for a F-E-E.
This article may NOT be reprinted without monetary compensation and written permission from the author.
For reprint rights or comments/questions about this article, please contact the author.
|
